Strategies to Fight Self Criticism

People consider their self-criticism as though it's a component of themselves, like their finger prints. Rachel Turow, a clinical psychologist with a Seattle address and the author of The Self-Talk Workout. 'Oh, I've just always been my own most difficult critic,' they claim. And many people are unaware of how harmful it is.

It's frequently caused on by traumatic experiences as a youngster, such as emotional bullying, sexism, homophobia, and social media use. It may also serve as a means of self-defense: Nobody will harm you as much as you're going to harm yourself if you're being unkind to yourself, the saying goes.

The good news is that there are many tools available to enable us to be happier to ourselves. We requested advice from experts on how to stop critical self-talk.

Spirituality on loving-kindness is helpful.

According to research, the practise of loving-kindness meditation can enhance emotional well-being. According to Turow, it can also aid in modifying your self-talk. In this exercise, you repeat to yourself wishes such as "May I be safe, may I be happy, may I be healthy, may I live easily." Green explains, "You repeat these in silence for, say, five minutes." Many people remark it seems silly, but after using it for a while, they start to see results.

She continues by saying it's useful to have an alternative to the usual critiques that go through your head. You'll know just what to say to yourself when that painful noise in your head starts to become loud.

Substitute of your inner critic, use an independent voice.

It takes time and effort to change negative beliefs, so it doesn't happen instantly. Green advises neutralising them with ideas first; you may move on to positive ones later. Imagine, for instance, that you frequently comment negatively on your hair. Try this instead of convincing yourself that everything is lush and beautiful: "What if I'm wrong? What if I have fine hair? Instead of forcing oneself to adopt a good attitude, doing so brings you to a point where you can question the negative notion. This is more realistic (and sincere).

Create a self-reflection jar.

Put a quarter or piece of paper in a jar each time you notice yourself thinking critically. Green suggests placing it in a very prominent location. In the beginning, you want to have a lot of pennies in the jar since that shows that you're becoming more conscious of your thought patterns and how they affect your emotions and behaviours. But you should start to realise that you're adding to it less frequently during the following three to six months. According to her, having a visible means to track your progress can be inspiring and fulfilling.

Appreciate your victories.

Write down 10 things you did that day that helped you, someone else, or the entire world before you go to bed each night. "Nothing is too little. You sent a text to a buddy, got out of bed, and took a vitamin, she observes. It causes your brain to feel as though "I am doing these good things." That can be a potent counterbalance to self-doubt and the all-too-common sensation that you didn't accomplish enough that day.

Enlist help

Critical thoughts can occasionally resemble lift music that you don't even realise is playing in the background. When you speak poorly of yourself, Green advises having a partner, friend, or therapist gently call your attention to it. Make an informed decision because, as she admits, hearing someone say, "You just criticised yourself," "can be very off-putting." It appears to be more critical. However, a dependable trusted advisor can assist you in identifying trends that you would not have otherwise noticed.

Use a breathing technique.

Turow suggests starting with a super-quick exercise that just requires one breath if starting a meditation programme seems stressful. Say "inhale, my friend" as you take a breath in and "exhale, my friend" as you take a breath out. She advises you to breathe deeply and think of yourself as a friend, which is a gentle gesture that might help you change your natural self-criticism into self-love.